Here's What to Practice to Be More Resilient

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From the time we are children, most of us are taught not to trust our “human radar system.” As young girls, we are told to be polite and respectful to adults, no matter what. Babysitters, some of whom are complete strangers, arrive to care for us, and when we object, we are scolded by our parents. When we are forced to endure coaches, teachers, and other authority figures who do not feel good to us, we are told to keep our feelings to ourselves and not rock the boat. 

Having little control over the people we spend time with, we learn to disregard how other people make us feel. It is no wonder that by the time we are grown women, many of us have lost touch with our ability to “feel people out.” 

However, the people we choose to spend time with impact how we will feel about ourselves and how we will feel about our lives. Ignoring how people make us feel is tuning out one of our most important sources of information. 

Resilient people “feel people out.” They stack the deck in their favor, surrounding themselves with people who make them feel good and bring out their best qualities while distancing themselves from people who make them feel bad, who drain their energies, or who bring out their worst qualities. 

Tune in to how people feel to you and how you feel in their presence, and choose to spend time with people who lift you up and inspire you to be the best version of yourself. And teach your kids, if you have them, to do the same. 

Who are the best-feeling people in your life? 

Tags: Friends, Self Care, Self Confidence

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Written By

Kristin MacDermott

Kristin MacDermott, LMFT, is the author of It Takes Two Minutes to Shift Your Mindset and Build Resilience and the creator... See Full Bio

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