21 Funny Female Quotes About Love

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Our favorite quotes about love don’t just warm our hearts, they make us laugh, too. As you prep for Valentine's Day season, get in the mood with funny female quotes about love from some of our favorite women

1Carroll Bryant

“Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.” 

2Joan Crawford

“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.”

3Lily Tomlin

“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?”

4Joan Rivers

“My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it’s missing, and what’s there stinks.”


“A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime, that doesn’t mean she can’t have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones.” 

6Chelsea Handler

“Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.” 

7Mindy Kaling

“True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure’ and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part.” 

8Elizabeth Taylor

“I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed, too — for being married so many times.”

9Rita Rudner

“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” 

10Oprah Winfrey

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” 

11Judith Viorst

“Love is the same as like except you feel sexier.”

12Elizabeth Evans

“I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” 

13Katherine Mansfield

“If only one could tell true love from false love as one can tell mushrooms from toadstools.”

14Bettina Arndt

“Women hope men will change after marriage, but they don’t; men hope women won’t change, but they do.” 

15Lucille Ball

“It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes.” 

16Pauline Thomason

“Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.”

17Chelsea Peretti

“If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.”

18Fran Lebowitz

“If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.” 

19Margaret Atwood

“The Eskimos had 52 names for snow because it was important to them; there ought to be as many for love.”

20Pearl Bailey

“What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.” 

21Audrey Hepburn

“The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” 

Tags: Dating, love, Marriage, valentine's day

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Written By

Katka Lapelosová

Katka is a writer from New York City, currently living in Belgrade, Serbia. See Full Bio

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