Chrissy Teigen Addresses Being Canceled: 'I Feel Lost'
Chrissy Teigen is opening up about what it's been like getting canceled, telling fans this week that she's "learned a whollllle lot."
The model and cookbook author shared some of the things she's been thinking about amid the numerous allegations of bullying that have been waged against her by the likes of Courtney Stodden and designer Michael Costello.
"Iiiii don't really know what to say here...just feels so weird to pretend nothing happened in this online world but feel like utter s--t in real life," wrote the 35-year-old under a picture of herself sitting on her couch. "Going outside sucks and doesn't feel right, being at home alone with my mind makes my depressed head race. But I do know that however I’m handling this now isn’t the right answer."
She told fans she feels "lost and need to find my place again, I need to snap out of this."
"I desperately wanna communicate with you guys instead of pretending everything is okay. I’m not used to any other way!! Cancel club is a fascinating thing and I have learned a whollllle lot. Only a few understand it and it’s impossible to know til you’re in it. And it’s hard to talk about it in that sense because obviously, you sound whiney when you’ve clearly done something wrong. It just sucks. There is no winning. But there never is here anyhow," she went on.
Earlier this year, Teigen apologized to Stodden for an offensive tweet she posted in 2011 and said of her behavior that she was "ashamed and completely embarrassed." Shortly after, she posted her thoughts on what happened with Stodden on Medium and offered some reflection. In response to that, Costello came forward with additional allegations against Teigen and claimed Teigen had both called him a "racist" and attempted to blacklist him.
Teigen has since pushed back on Costello's claims, insisting that the screenshots he's produced to prove that she bullied him were fabricated.
In the conclusion of her Instagram post this week, Teigen told fans that she just "needed an honest moment" with her followers because she's "tired of being sick with myself all day."
"I don’t even know if it’s good to say any of this because it’s gonna get brutally picked apart but I dunno," she said before wrapping up with this plea: "If you or someone you know has also been canceled please let me know if there is a cancel club reunion because I could use some time off my couch!"